Difficult Conversations As Self-Regulatory Conflicts

Authors:

Abstract: Many people struggle to initiate difficult conversations. We tested whether this difficulty stems from self-regulatory conflict, contrary to the prevailing explanation that people misunderstand the benefits of such discussions. Across diverse samples (laypeople from the U.S., politicians, physicians, university students from Hong Kong), people characterized difficult conversations as having a structure that is typical of self-regulatory conflict, in which the perceived costs preceded the benefits (Studies 1a–1d, 2). As a prototypical test of self-regulatory conflict, we found that people show a robust preference for having difficult conversations in the distant versus near future (Studies 3a–3b). Finally, we investigated whether people were aware of the self-regulatory nature of difficult conversations by examining their willingness to take up costly commitment devices (Study 4). Our findings shed light on the nature of difficult conversations and point to interventions to promote honesty in personal and professional life.

Track: COMM

Keywords: difficult conversations; self-regulation; honesty