Please Apologize! The Negative Consequences of Soliciting Apologies

Abstract: One way that victims restore their threatened sense of agency after conflict is through deciding whether to accept an apology. However, apologies are not always given immediately post-conflict, and instead victims might decide to demand an apology directly from the transgressor. In this research, drawing upon the needs-based model of reconciliation and social distance theory, we propose that a victim soliciting an apology from a transgressor post conflict, fosters increased powerlessness in the transgressor and ultimately leads to increased avoidance. The first two studies, utilizing a micro-narrative approach, suggested that while victims feel better after soliciting an apology, transgressors feel negative and want to avoid the victim more. Study 3 using an experimental design found support for our full proposed model. This study contributes to the literature on post-conflict behaviors and identifies another way in which victims address their lack of agency post-conflict.

Keywords: Conflict Resolution, Justice, Power